The Battle of Mae Mae

We have a battle going on in our home...the battle of mae mae (prounounced may may). Our little T is now three years old and she is STILL asking to nurse. I know, I know...it's crazy. I never thought I would be here and dealing with this!

I stupidly thought my second child would just wean herself by her first birthday and I would have a cry about how big she was getting and we'd move on. But that has not happened. Instead it has turned into a battle. The worse part is that she is stubborn, like her mother. I say no, she says yes. And we can go back in forth until she gives up. Because I realize now, I am the one that created this nursing monster and so in the end it is I who must re-create her. She is my last baby and part of me knows I have not been as adamant as I could be, because I won't have the ability to console and comfort her so completely. When she is having a bad day or a god awful tantrum...I can quiet the tears and the sadness with a quick nursing. Yet I know it is truly time to stop and have her learn that a cuddle and kisses can console just as well. Or that Daddy is great at giving hugs and making one feel safe.

And so...the battle of mae mae wages on. Especially in the middle of night, when we are both most vulnerable. Me wanting to just sleep and her wanting to feel me next to her, where she can easily nurse. Last night she finally looked me in the eye and said "I will not go to sleep until I have mae mae!" Part of me cheered...because she was not giving up and then I looked at the time (3:17 a.m.) and wondered how I ended up with such a headstrong child.

Messy Hair Don't Care...give me mae mae!

I never thought I would be the mom who has been nursing for 5 years. Actually I never really gave it much thought, I just knew that I would try and we would see what happens. And so the battle wages on and in the end, I know who will win. I just hope someone is ready to console me.

Why Yes, I Still Breastfeed!

Long ago, before baby arrived it was a no brainer that I was going to breastfeed. I was not squeamish about my breast or the fact that they would suddenly not be a sexual entity but a nutritional one. I knew it was best for baby and best for our wallet if I wanted to stay home.

Day one of breastfeeding in the hospital was frustrating! Even with the help of the wonderful lactation consultants, I had problems. This was mainly due to the fact that my milk did not come in until the morning we were being discharged. Well that and the fact that watching videos of others doing it makes it seem like a walk in the park. It's all good until you are holding a tiny person in your arms and suddenly your boob is bigger than their head and all the advice from the consultant and videos are out the window as you try and let your motherly instincts take over.

Nursing isn't for everyone. But I knew I would give it at least 6 months. This is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics. You can see more of what they have to say here. It's funny cause when it comes to your child, you shouldn't need to read or hear it from anyone else to continue to do what is good for them.

I started out knowing I would give breastfeeding at least 6 months. When 6 months came and went and I was still comfortable and he hadn't been sick, I knew another 3 months to make it 9 would be no problem. People would often ask how long I planned to keep at it and I would tell them at least a year. But factors like teeth, solids foods and growth spurts all came into play and could change the dynamics. They didn't. So here I am with a 14 month old and we still nurse. I've taught him how to sign that he wants to nurse and most days he can come up to me and give the the sign.

Did I think I would still be nursing at 14 months? No. Do I mind? No. Should others mind? No. People are funny once you have children, everyone has advice to give. But when it comes to breastfeeding, everyone has advice AND an opinion. There are those that won't even attempt it cause they deem it gross. There are others who just can't ever get comfortable with it after attempting. And still others who would gladly nurse as long as possible.

Where am I? Somewhere in the middle. I know Spencer has not been sick or had problems flying and I attribute that to breastfeeding. It makes him happy and for me is a workout. I know it is the reason I weigh less than I did before getting pregnant! Hello, buying jeans in a size I haven't seen in quite a while is a very good thing. Could breastfeeding be the reason? Sure, so why would I stop? Ok, I kid...maybe.

Is there the possibility that he will be 24 months and still nursing? Maybe. But in the end that is my decision to make and live with. Everyone else? They can be happy I am not using their mammary glands to nurse and look the other way cause if not, you might see something you don't want to see.