A few years back I was listening to some relationship expert talking about, well, relationships. There is one thing they said that has stuck with me since the day I heard it. When we get into relationships, we teach the other person how to treat us. I mulled over this advice for a while and then I saw what they meant and it all clicked.
I had a few bad relationships in college but I never had the type of relationships that I've seen friends and family stay in for the sake of not being alone. To put with abuse, both verbal and physical. To let someone take the very best of you until what remained was just a vacant shell of the person you use to be? Why would anyone let it get to that point?
We teach our partners how to treat us. I have repeated this to many a friend/family member in a bad relationship. When we allow another person to belittle us to make themselves feel better and never stand up for ourselves? That begins the cycle. You let it happen once and now this person realizes they can get away with their behavior. The longer you let it happen? The harder it will be to walk away from.
No one wants to be alone. Many of us go through life waiting for that special someone to come into our lives, so we can share the best of who we are with them. But if you allow someone to take that from you before you meet that person? You may never meet the person you are suppose to be be with.
I am tired of seeing statuses on Facebook lamenting broken relationships. If you spend more time being angry at your significant other, it may be time to move on. Look at the time you have spent together as experience and call it a day. Letting them treat you like crap, putting it on Facebook for the world to see and then taking them back? That cycle will never end. You taught them way back when that this behavior was okay and until you make/take a stand, it won't get better. Why are people so afraid of being alone? Isn't it better to be alone and healthy, than in a toxic relationship?
When you bring someone new into your life..take a moment to think about how you want them to treat you...then teach them.