Sunday, January 9, 2011

Stream of Consciousness Sunday: Writer's Block

Join in the fun, it's Stream of Consciousness Sunday!

I spend a few minutes each day thinking about what I will write about on Sunday and with a mind is constantly whirring, things can get pretty jumbled in my head. But on thing stuck out...writer's block.

While I didn't set any real resolutions, Idid decide that I was going to do better about taking time for myself. Taking the breaks I need to find the me I seem to have lost in motherhood. This break includes getting back to writing.

I use to consider mysefl a writer. I use to write every day and while I don't have anything published, I wrote for the joy of it. Poems, short stories, novellas, stories with no ending. It was an outlet for how I was feeling. A way to get back at someone that wronged me. It was therapeutic. And I loved every minute of it. I was good at it. Or at least that's what people told me who read my works of fiction. But it didn't matter because I did it for me.

Yes, I dream of one day being published and sitting with Oprah and talking about what inspired me and how I feel about my book being made into a movie. But in reality writing was a part of me. It was the artistic side of me and I loved it. But I've gotten away from it. Using one excuse after another and now? Now I have the ideas but can't seem to string them together to write more than a paragraph or two before I lose interest. I have some sort of writer's block. Motherhood writer's block. Or maybe the block is just all in my head?

All I know is I need to get back to a point where I am writing again. A point where I can say I am a writer and not feel like a fraud. I was a writer, damn it. And I want to be one again.


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